GOING DEEP
"How do you view submission?" Carolyn asks at the beginning of this chapter. What is your answer to that question?
What are the benefits of submission--in our marriage or some other area of our lives--and how have you experienced them?
Tell us about a recent "submission moment" in your life. How did you repond? What is the link between trusting God and submitting to your husband?
Carol's testimony is a true example of feminine appeal. What are specific ways that you can bring honor to the gospel by practicing biblical submission in your marriage?
4 comments:
I view it as my role...not as a negative thing, but as a sometimes challenging thing. I used to HATE the idea. I suppose it was my sinful nature, but I also had no concept of the fact that as a man loves God (and submits to HIM) and loves his wife, his decisions reflect that and are not altogether detestable. Sure the occasional, "You can't seriously be thinking that's the best solution?!" flits through my mind, but I never doubt that Matt is seeking to do his best to honor God and care for his family. And we're all growing in this whole leadership/submission thing. :)
I think in all aspects of submission, there's a peace and contentment that flows from not trying to control (hard to believe your hearing that from a total control freak?). And, of course, there's the joy that flows from being obedient to God...it helps to see it as obeying God rather than ONLY obeying man...there's a humility factor there.
Unlike Carolyn's illustration, I'm the recklessly generous one while Matt tends to be careful how much we're giving/gifting. One of our recent situations is a coworker of his just had a baby. I immediately wanted to make a meal and deliver it, but Matt thought that was completely unnecessary. I see it as an opportunity to bless, to establish connections with people who don't know Jesus, etc. That doesn't occur to him. If I bring that up, I exasperate him. So I have to let it go. So I suppose I pray for him and find cost-free ways to bless others? If you can think of some cost-free ways to bless those you don't know, PLEASE send them my way! I trust that God has burdened my heart in his direction for His glory. My role is to submit to Matt. I think God will work on his heart to make him a more cheerful giver, and I can help lessen the "money anxiety" by choosing affordable ways to be generous.
The respect issue. Everything I say and do should refect a respectful attitude toward my husband. Currently (and sadly so) that is not the case. If I better controlled my thoughts and words, my unwavering demonstration of respect for my husband would speak volumes to pretty much everyone, setting a God-honoring example for others to follow as well.
I had heard the reason of the curse before reading this chapter, so my view was in that aspect. Submission being a struggle with sin to women due to the fall of man.
As Carolyn mentioned the benefit of submission is the gospel lived out. This is especially true when our children watch our marriages lived out.
I have a couple of submission moments. I wanted to order some accessories for my girl's Christmas dresses. I had them all picked out through online shopping. Matthew didn't approve. Rather than submitting I whined. I don't think he ever completely agreed, but I went ahead to order. One of the items was no longer available. It happened to be the one item I think I really needed (it was a long sleeve to go under a jumper-type dress) I still haven't found anything else.
The second moment I am living through: we moved into my in-laws previous home, while trying to sell our home. Matthew's dad wants to purchase our home now, so we can take advantage of the low interest rates. Well I didn't think this was a good idea. Then I read the chapter. I did go back on my words to let Matthew make the decision he felt was best. So I not did I sin in my lack of immediate submission, but worse yet I didn't trust the Lord.
I have had believing women gasp at my submission to Matthew. Unfortunately I was probably complaining about my submission. My family also thinks I'm too submissive to Matthew. This is hard for me. Satan then starts to attack me and doubt if I really need to submit. I have at times relented on my submission.
cost-free ways...borrow a book. give recipes. give suggestions, e.g someone gave me a roll of paper towels with a recipe card on how to make your own wipes. give advice. give your number. invite them for a play date. make a meal for yourself and package half and freeze for the family. hand-me-downs.
Thanks for the ideas, Maria! God bless you for promoting submission in my home!!! :)
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